50+ Lifestyles

In and Out of the Quad-Cities

Contributed by
Gail McPike and Toni Hall

The Last Hurrah

Somehow we find it hard to believe how quickly time flies by. In many ways, that exciting, exhilarating, and somewhat scary day in 2009 (some might call it “fateful”) when we signed up with 50+ Lifestyles seems like a week ago. We have had the fun of sharing our QCA Experience with friends; old and new. We thought we would re-live some of our favorite adventures.

In 2009, we chronicled our adventures at the Kewanee Hog Days. We told the story of the pigs and piglets harkened to celebrity by the citizens of Kewanee. We also stopped by Good’s Furniture in hopes of finding the perfect chair for Ms. Toni.

In 2010, we asked readers to take this pop quiz: Aboard which of the following modes of transportation have we not enjoyed a nice meal and a beverage?
A.    In a canoe navigating the Wapsipinicon River
B.    In a sternwheeler riverboat
C.    In the dining car of a steaming locomotive
D.    In a brand-new Honda Camry
E.    All of the above
The answer was: E might have been a good guess, but in reality the answer is D.  It was a trick question, we would never consider McDonald’s drive-through to be a nice meal.

In 2011, we took a visit to the Iowa Straw Poll and hobnobbed with the heavy hitters of journalism. We even used our “semi-official” press credentials to gain access to the press pavilion. Later we joined the candidates in downing some barbeque and lemonade. Current Trophy Husband Frank got his picture taken with both Barry Goldwater Jr. and a George Washington impersonator. He sure thought he was cool.

Over the six years, we’ve written tributes to everyone and everything from Toni’s 90 plus year old mother to daddy’s favorite hamburger palaces. We even did an ode to the yellow porch. Those lights seem to attract bugs better than the Statue of Liberty attracts the huddled masses. We’ve opened ourselves to criticism. Do you remember the letter from Santa back in 2012?  Here is a portion of message:
“To the Editors of 50+ Lifestyles,    Today, Elf Gherkin interrupted my schedule with an APB on this Gail and Toni duo. They seem to be a quart low on making their deadlines with your publication. Sadly, this kind of behavior doesn’t really surprise me. These two have been bouncing on and off the naughty list for well over a half-century. Over the years, I have deposited enough coal in their stockings to power the whole Midwest. If it weren’t for the stellar behavior exhibited by their Current Trophy Husbands (CTH) Frank and Phil, the reindeer would know the only deposit for their house would come in the form of deer droppings.”

So it is with a feeling of sadness, we pass along this message. The old gang is breaking up. Toni and CTH Phil, after many years of QC Life, are retiring back to their native Gold Mining Hills of California. Gail has gotten wrapped up in her fiber artistry. The continued research and preparation for this piece required consumed much time – time Gail would prefer to allocate to shearing sheep, spinning wool and knitting Estonian Lace.

We are going to miss our few moments with you each month. We are going to cherish the memories of hanging out at the 50+ Lifestyles’ office with our feet on the desk and our minds wandering out the window. We will definitely miss the kind words so many of you have passed along at social events.  But we’ve got good news. We have found a replacement.  Allow us to introduce your new author: Q.C. Jones. Mr. Jones why don’t you take it away….

Hello everyone, this is Q.C. Jones. Like the ladies before me, I was not born in the Quad-Cities, but I got here as soon as I could.  Actually, as I travel the country, I tell people, “I was born in Texas, raised in Illinois, lived in Milwaukee, Cleveland, Cedar Rapids and Des Moines… but I chose the QCA as my final resting spot.”  This comment normally makes people smile, but a few have asked if I said “resting” or “rusting.” My time in Davenport and the greater QCA (17 years) is more than double my time in any place on this planet.
I intend to call my string of articles, “Just Saying…” Why this selection? Well, according to National Public Radio commentator Scott Simon: “Saying, ‘just saying…’ puts a fire escape onto the end of a sentence. It lets you express a stern — even rude — opinion, but not really. You’re ‘just saying.’ It invites the listener to discount what we’ve just heard, even as we’re reeling from it.”

While I wouldn’t say these two fine ladies weren’t cutting edge, I plan to tickle your funny bone and occasionally ruffle your feathers like nothing you’ve read… Just Saying.

Oh, by the way, if you want to re-read any of the past articles from Gail and Toni, go to www.50pluslife.com. Then just type in their names in the search engine on the left.