50+ Lifestyles

Just Saying…

By Q.C. Jones

Mindless mumbles
from my maladjusted mind

Another old wives’ tale bites the dust. “April showers bring May flowers” myth discredited in Davenport. We did the research and discovered the April Showers bring May flowers statement doesn’t apply to the Quad-Cities. In fact, it doesn’t even apply to the United States. According Wikipedia, the phrase applies to Merry Old England which isn’t that merry during March and April.  The major cause of the incessantly heavy downpours is the position of the jet stream. In early spring, the jet stream starts to move northwards, allowing large depressions to bring strong winds and rain in from the Atlantic. The track of these depressions is across Ireland and England bringing bands of rain followed by heavy showers (often of hail or snow) and strong blustery winds.

The first mention of the April Shower phenomenon was via poetry first recorded in 1610 about a decade prior to the Pilgrims placing their first buckle-clad foot onto Plymouth Rock. Further, the whole commentary is more about periods of intense suffering preceding a time of joy. Hopping into the old “Way-Back Machine” and setting the dials for England 1600, we would find a bunch of previously unidentified ancestors dressed in dirty rags, mourning the death of Queen Elizabeth and living in “cruck houses” which consisted of sticks covered over with a mixture of straw, mud and manure.  My guess is these driving rains didn’t do much for the spirits of their inhabitants, not to mention the fun olfactory sensations wafting off wet manure walls.  And, if you are thinking all this could have been improved with a nice warm cup of tea, tea didn’t arrive in England until 1652.  Yep, the flowers were probably well received.

Speaking of flowers, based on my own yard, the biggest flower of May might actually be the dandelion. No amount of yard treatment, manual digging or other methods seem to work in getting rid of these pests, although I seem to recall a little gadget that resembled a flame-thrower for plants which at least provided some entertainment value as you imagined them screaming as they met the flame.

You will no doubt scratch your head when you learn that dandelions aren’t native to the Quad-Cities but were purposefully introduced by English settlers because their “lovely colours” (they spelled colors wrong back then, too) reminded them of May back in Jolly Old England. There is even one report that Pilgrims planted the first batch of the yellow blight because they believed the roots to hold medicinal value.  From where I sit, the only real value comes via German settlers in Amana using the flower tops to crank out Dandelion Blossom wine. All I can say is waste not want not.

Hanging on to industrious German immigrants milling around the back yard planning their next dandelion patch, local folk-lore has it that it was the Krauts who brought black quirrels to our community. I had visions of Lederhosen clad grandpa’s releasing tree climbing pets to the Quad-Cities.  But, discovered another myth to debunk.
Black Squirrels are a big deal.  Even the QCA Visitors and Convention Bureau features a story on our furry friends.  Digging deeper into the subject reveals these little buggers are found across the U.S., but most can be traced to Ontario, Canada. Here’s the scoop on ours:

“Black squirrels are well established in the Quad Cities area along the Iowa-Illinois boundary. According to one story, recounted in the book “The Palmers”, they were first introduced on the Rock Island Arsenal Island. Some of them then escaped by jumping across ice floes on the Mississippi River when it was frozen and populated other areas in Rock Island.”

What can you say, our relation back in the old-days did some whacky things. For instance, President Teddy Roosevelt released 18 squirrels in the National Zoo in D.C. and now some hundred years later over 50 percent of the squirrels (four- legged variety, that is) in the Washington area are of the black squirrel variety.

Now back to May. I recently made the rounds of a number of local saloons, taverns and other gathering spots of QCA old timers. The mission: to determine the best time to plant tomatoes. Based on my observation, the Quad-City area is over-populated with experts in this department. As with experts everywhere, disagreements flourish.
There are three schools of thought on the proper time and place for tomato planting. First, the April 20th School. This group believes any frosting done after April 20th will not be severe enough to significantly damage the plant and insists the cooler temperatures will encourage the plant to produce into September. We’ll refer to the second school as the May 15th Clan. They insist you ready the garden and sometime on May 15th slip out and plop the baby plants into place.

Finally there is the Science Crew.  These folks rely on science and mathematics to grow a reliable flow of tomatoes.  Based on caterpillar fur, the first daddy long legs sighting and the Old Farmer’s Almanac, they say planting should be done between 10:44 p.m. on May 13th and 6:02 a.m. on May 15th – not a second sooner or later.

Most of the experts I spoke to said dandelion wine tastes weedy, but the hops in beer has a flowery flavor.

Just saying….