May 1, 2025
Just Saying…
The May Poll
By Q.C. Jones
Unprofessional as it may be, I felt it worthwhile to give you, my dear readers, an inside look at the editorial/journalistic process for this fine publication. A few days ago, I chatted with the beloved editor of 50+ Lifestyles Magazine. Allow me to share the story.
Besides turning QC Jones’ incoherent drivel into readable English, this tolerant lady also rousts your pal QC out of hibernation each month with an email providing deadline status, as in “Hey QC, your article was due yesterday. Is there an issue? Alien abduction? Kidnapped by terrorists? Or, inebriated? Get busy!”
This month was different. I received no email. I was worried. Did I finally cross the line with my weird words, offbeat humor, or halfwit hubris? I was relieved when she kindly said, “No QC, we didn’t vote you off the planet. As a matter of fact, I was about to send you a request to give us some recollections of May Polls (or something like that).”
Relieved by this reprieve, I sleepily jotted down “article about May Polls” and dozed off in the big recliner my grandkids call “Grandpa’s Chair.” I dreamed about polls, poles, and my many Polish-American friends.
Arriving at my 150-year-old high bluff hovel overlooking both Arsenal Island and Rock Island, I had a few thoughts about my Friend Larry Joe Taylor’s song titled “Living on island time.” I pulled the crumpled note from the pocket of my jeans and did a Google search on “May poll” to get a better understanding of this mysterious May poll phenomenon. I found nothing. But being clever and creative, I decided to develop my own May poll – we’ll call it the Official QC Jones May Poll.
What is the most common use of the word poll or pole?
North pole.
Because most of us are sick and “dang” tired of polls of the political and related topics most often carried on the nightly news, we decided to eliminate polls from the running. That eliminates opinion polls, exit polls, Presidential polls, and a plethora of other terms used to stir up controversy. Worry not, there are hundreds of poles to chose from. Our massively complex Artificial Intelligence (AI) drive exploration went to number 400. Here is a sample:
Numero Uno – The North Pole wins the number one spot. Ever since Saint Nicholas, the fourth-century Christian bishop of Greek descent and hailing from the city of Myra (now located in modern-day Turkey) moved his headquarters to the North Pole, the phrase has dominated the lead position. Think of all the books, stories, letters, and references to Santa. Further, famous explorers have traveled there, European airline flights traverse it in route to Europe, and every magnet has a north and south pole. Each mention contributes to its popularity.
Number Two – The South Pole comes in second. In my humble opinion, this is driven by South Pole’s kinship with its northern brother, and those cute little penguins that call the place home.
Number Three – Pole Position. NASCAR and Formula One auto racing have found their way into the hearts and on the Television screen of millions of families. Over three million folks tune into every NASCAR event. Formula One draws 70 million views – but they don’t count because many of them are from Europe where the term would be “vorderster startplatz, position de tête,” or some other foreign gibberish.
Number Four – Flagpole. Memorial Day is the last Monday in May. Flag Day falls shortly after in June. My neighbor just gave me a new flagpole, and I plan to fly the flag through the summer. Finally, over the years, I have been blessed with many friends of Polish American heritage. One of these friends, who sadly passed away five years ago went by the name of Mark “The Polack” Skonetski. He always said, “Remember this QC, the American Flag is held by a pole.” I don’t know if that counts in this poll but I couldn’t help but mention it.
Skipping forward over some rather mundane listings like utility pole, light pole, and a few more unworthy of mentioning, we come to number ten on the hit parade.
Number Ten – Fishing Pole. Two summers ago, my grandson Rhett caught his first fish. Since that time, he has visualized himself as a latter-day Issac Walton and wants to catch more.
May pole.
Remember the May Pole. I fear it is growing extinct. Searching through the list of oft mentioned poles (using AI), the phrase didn’t make it into the top 400, and I think that’s a dang shame. Further research indicates “May Poling” could be dangerous involving fall risks, strains and sprains, crowd control issues, lightning strikes and other weather hazards.
I can assure you the QC Jones May Poll is 100 percent safe. The May Pole may not be.
Just saying… QC Jones
